Most people have mastered the art of dodging and procrastinating. While it may come useful in certain situations, the phrase “I don’t know”, often given when asked about a question that one wants to avoid addressing at that particular moment is a convenient excuse to not work on it now. There is a difference between not knowing and not wanting to deal with a situation. When used in the former sense, it allows growth to take place. However, doing so in the latter context impedes it. There is only so long that one can run from facing a situation head on. Sooner or later, it will come. Rather than letting the thought of facing it control you, take charge by confronting it head on.
Whatever was in your past has occurred and there is nothing that you can do to change that simple fact. The sooner you accept it, the better it will be for you. A lot of people like to dwell in the past, thinking how and what they could have done better only to make themselves feel worser than ever. You need to realise that what matters right now, in this instance is your decision of how to move forward. Are you going to be like most who move forward constantly thinking about the past or you going to let the past remain where it rightfully belongs – in the past – and focus on what you can do better in the future? The power has always been in your hands, you were just too consumed in your past to see that.
In order to achieve what you want, your dreams and goals, you need to commit. That means you need to do the things that you do not really need to. The things that if you did not do, will not threaten your well-being and livelihood, but if you do them, you will get closer to what you desire. It is up to you to make that commitment. That you will make the move from optional to non-negotiable. That you will wake up early in the morning and work on yourself. That you will go to the gym and give it your all even though people say that you are already looking great as you are. The reason you still do them anyway is not because it is not true, but because you have a different set of standards. Not that you are ungrateful but you believe that you can do more, that you deserve more. That is why it may be optional to some, but to you, what you do is simply non-negotiable.
If you are the type of person who needs to have people around you going through the same things as you are, have them like you and sing your praises, then be prepared to have what they have, which most likely may not be what you want. There is no other way around it. If you take on the path that everyone takes, you will have what they have, with perhaps a slight difference. But if you wish to have something that very few people have, you need to be prepared for a lonely journey ahead. Sure, there will be others doing something similar around the globe, working insanely hard to achieve their dreams, but most of the time, you are on your own. People around you might not understand you, they might even have meetings about you. But if you are serious about becoming who you are meant to be, then forge right ahead on your path, however lonely it might seem. People may or may not come around. That is okay. But what matters in the end, is that you have lived out your truth.
If you want to get to the bottom of things, you need to be prepared. Be prepared for the cold hard truth. And yes, sometimes it does stink too. You need to realise that until you uncover the underlying truth to a matter, the one that is being swept under the rug, the one where it is just conveniently not spoken out loud, the one where deep down inside you know what that is but afraid to vocalise it because you fear what doing so would mean to everything you hold dear, you will never be totally free. Free to do what you are meant to do in this life. We all have our purposes and dreams. But there is always something in the way. We can continually blame the lack of progress on it or we can own it, lift it up, clear the path and march right on. It is all up to us to decide if we will feel the fear and do it anyway.
Like how most people like to categorise the good things that happen to them either by chance or not as luck, that is how you need to remind yourself whenever you feel like not putting in the hard work or taking a break. Opportunities or ‘luck’ do not usually give you a courtesy call or a heads up before appearing at your feet. They just appear. And when they appear, you got to be ready because if you are not, it will go to someone else who is.
If you hear adjectives or names being called at a person in a discussion, pay careful attention to the content in it. Do your hardest to set aside the emotions and high energy involved and focus on the meanings and words being used in the exchange. What you would find might shed some light to the diminishing level of intellectual discourse present at all levels right now in general. When a person does not have a valid argument to counter with, he or she would succumb to the easiest and lowest form of speech by name calling the other person. Of course, this does not apply to everybody. Just those who cannot handle their big egos thus concede and admit defeat. When someone does that, credibility is lost, especially when in a discussion. It does not move the conversation further but a sense of accomplishment might be felt in a personal capacity of the vocal assailant. Do not be that person. That person will lose respect from a lot of people, and it is hard to like someone who is like that. Come with facts and evidence to solidify your argument.